Vegetable Condominiums

we’re two cauliflowers jumping over
the cracks in the sidewalk.
we’re two asparagus needling our way between 

fences to run across grasses that are 
“private.” you make like a carrot and kiss 
me under the football lights like 

we’re in a movie. the movie is
“Salad Spinners Gone Rogue” and i’m a 
lead actress. i put the fun in fondue 

and ice-skate outside in the summer 
because i’ve decided the weather 
isn’t real. you ruffle my hair. 

i smack your stomach, again and again, 
telling you to stop. you have a sheepish grin 
like a lasagna. i tell you, i’ll hightail 

my ass out of this messy concoction. 
out of this exuberant anomaly.
you and me. unlikely 

superheroes. rescuers of inappropriate 
refrigerator storage.
in our Vegetable Condominiums, 

we do the worm across
all the floors. we lie face-down 
on the rugs and sing Sheryl Crow 

into their furs, into the cascading
rays of an endless afternoon.

---

Sam Herschel Wein (he/they) (@samforbreakfast) is a lactose-intolerant, cheese-obsessed poet who specializes in perpetual frolicking. They are an MFA candidate in poetry at the University of Tennessee-Knoxville. Their second chapbook, GESUNDHEIT!, a collaboration with Chen Chen, was part of the 2019-2020 Glass Poetry Press Series. He co-founded and edits Underblong. Recent work can be found in The Adroit Journal, Shenandoah, and Sundog Lit, among others.