37 Ways to Clean Cum from a Suede Shirt

37 ways       to clean cum from a suede shirt—       what we’ll call instead 
How To Polish Your       Masterpiece.
If not, wear it       as a shawl instead. 

You can rub it out       with magic erasers or       a box of brillo. 
Burn it with your books       or tell people it’s just spilled       ethanol instead. 

You can spin cycle       or pay the banglas downstairs       to fluff & fold it. 
Leave it with the trash,        adding to the bio stink       in the hall, instead. 

Lick it while it’s wet. 
Douse it in acid cream or       rinse it through hot juice. 
Toss it from the bridge       like a bad king into the       waterfall instead. 

Let it soak the grease       up in your neon kitchen. 
Press flowers with it. 
Jizz on it again       or aim for the Walt Whitman       on the wall instead. 

Smear gorgonzola       over it & feed it to       a wild pack of fags. 
I would cut it up       into pieces & give them       to all y’all instead. 

Pretend it’s blue jeans       & drive it out to the beach—       picket its brains out, 
kick in its blue balls—       or just past the city’s walls       like Saint Paul instead. 

Give it a gold frame. 
Sell it to the prince of some       ketchup republic, 
or keep your hands clean       & gift it to some young man       who is tall instead. 

#22:        stretch it taut & learn to paint. 
Brew it in black tea. 
Flush it down the john       or just go buy a new one       at the mall instead. 

Chilly wipes, summer’s       eve, bleach, down by the river,        tears or confession; 
spit shine, club soda,        or tumbler of your preferred       alcohol instead. 

Use it for wiping       constantly—every Wednesday—       the bar of the bar, 
or stitch it up with       my hair into a Jahan       voodoo doll instead.

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Jahan Khajavi (@jahankhajavi) (b. 1986, Fresno) composes & performs “wildly amusing & explicit queer poetry” (Vogue). Khajavi holds an MFA in Creative Writing from the University of Notre Dame & has had recent performances in Rome at the Swiss Institute, Fondazione Giuliani, Gavin Brown’s Enterprise, & Silvia Fendi’s backyard. Poems can be found or are forthcoming in Lotus-eater, Flash Cove, The Recluse, 14poems, & Baest.